It sounds cheesy to date your wife. But marriage can be a blessing if you continue to date your wife. Otherwise, marriage is hard. I feel like I’ve said that before and I sound like a robot.
Even though it’s difficult, it doesn’t have to be torture.
This post is directed more at the men and husbands out there – but I’m positive the ladies will see pearls of wisdom. (Just don’t shove this post in your husband’s face and tell him you were right all along. Let him figure it out for himself. It’ll feel better and more genuine for you too.)
Date your wife – Why dating is important
Before marriage, back when you’re courting and going on interesting dates, it feels like everything is exciting and new. Just going out for Starbucks or Taco Bell is a fun experience. (Although, perhaps you’ll pay for the taco trip a few hours later…)
But when you’re married, these things suddenly become routine. They’re generic life events. Grabbing dinner together no longer counts as a date. It’s boring to get something to eat.
I know for me personally, with my spouse, I felt like going out and doing anything together counted as a date. That’s what we did while dating – going on long drives or an errand around town – she loved all that stupid crap – and I loved spending time with her that way too.
But once you’re married, things change. Not good or bad. Just change. (Change can be good.)
This is the sort of advice you hear old people say and sounds ridiculous – continue to date your wife. I mean really, you’re spending all this time together now, how does that not count like it did before?
Because it doesn’t. The rules have changed.
Date your wife – Old Advice
There’s something ingrained in women where they want to feel special and loved. I don’t know what that means. I guess as men, we can compare that to our jobs, which we take so much pride in. If we were never appreciated or told we were doing a good job, it would make us miserable. And no amount of money in the world would make us stick around.
That’s how women feel. They want to know they’re loved and special, because they doubt it sometimes through the mundane life we’re always living.
I know I always love my wife. I tell her every day. But sometimes the busy life we live and the errands and the distractions, all get in the way of that message. Sometimes your actions matter more than your words.
Date your wife – The Rules
But luckily, there’s one simple and surefire way to reignite that fire and let your wife know she’s loved: Take her on a date.
Like a real date. Where you get dressed up and go to a fancy restaurant. And let her know it’s a date too – with no agenda or ulterior motive.
And when you’re on the date you’re not allowed to talk about the stupid crap you have to deal with or how miserable your day job is. Don’t talk about errands or taxes.
Just try to talk about something else, maybe something that interests her, like you would have when you were younger – because really, you are interested in her and everything that makes her tick. You need to remind her of that fact.
On our last date, we talked about our stupid dog for half the time. It felt like parents talking about their kids. But even that, it was about how silly he is and how happy he makes her. If you haven’t seen my dog, you should. He really is a knucklehead and does ridiculous things.
So to all the men out there, I know you can do it. Our wives are beautiful and interesting, so let’s remind them of that fact. And besides, going on a date is fun. What possible reason would you not want to go?
Date your wife – Action Steps:
- Take her on a date (you idiot)
- No talking about taxes
Have you continued to date your wife? How do you find dating benefits your marriage? Or are there things in the way that make it too hard?